6/17/2012

at the 'Core' class today before church we were asked to write down 5 thing I want to ask God n Jesus for...
Well, I was having a very hard time thinking of anything I would ask them for...
I mean yes you may see I want many interesting items n most would really help me in my daily life but I don't really thinking asking/praying for them would be cool/right...
Some may say how about not having the stroke, to late can't change the past nor would I, my stroke saved my life n gave me a renewed faith in the big guy n son, n changed how I live life n see the world n wanting to be a cool/good person maybe a little crazy(a lot) doing it...
Ok what about increase ability from my brain damage(stroke) well I feel the damage is a challenge n reminder of everything prestroke n etc... so I don't really want to pray for a change in it but if the Big Guy wants to change it for the better Cool but Im not going to ask...
The things I do wish to be different in my life I have a personal feeling that it's not cool to ask for it from them, I want to win the PowerBALL to be able to get off of Social Security Income n Medicaid Insurance... Living on SSI income n very challenging n the Medicaid system is getting to be a real pain(mainly because its gotten overrealmed) so I want to have funds to be able toget the medical equipment n care I really need like a PT n OT that can help in improving my abilities n etc... I think it a worthy goal to want to win the PowerBALL but very unsure about asking for prayers for that...

I do wish I had a GF/Wife again n would love God/Jesus's help there but I have an issue there too... without a better income dating is really unrealistic on my current income n if by chance I did get blessed with a GF/Wife my limited funds would make having a family super unrealistic... I barely can get my monthly stuff payed for, having a kid would be saddening(not being able to get stuff they would want)...

So, right now I guess I would only pray that God/Jesus continues to guide me in their plans n for my life!!!

I just hope they find a way for me to have a wife/family n be able to support them n myself...